We went to church and God used Pastor to really speak to me, actually for the last two weeks. Last week I went to the alter and tears just started flowing. I prayed for our country, a friend's son, my family, new president, and for all the hurting people right now. I was overwhelmed by what's going on in every one's life... It just seems like everyone is in a crisis or dealing with something they wish they weren't. I know this is life now. I cannot imagine being without Christ...so many people have no hope, nothing to hold on to. They may not even know God has his hand out reaching down to them...you.
Yesterday, pastor talked about our walk with Christ. How we should fast and pray. How we are either a performance-based christian or an obedience-driven christian. When we are in a performance-based religion we tend to have: motives that are selfish... a lifestyle that is not Christ-like towards others...and project outward spirituality. If we are fighting and not treating people right, we cannot expect God to do something amazing in our life. (Even if we are fasting.)
I am desperate for God to do something amazing in my life! To help me overcome any strongholds I know I have or any I do not even realize. To lose unwanted pounds finally, to help me have a clutter-free home, to be a better woman of God and to my family.
Back to church: I never take my cell phone in, however, this time it was in my coat pocket. In the middle of church I hear this "Hello Motto!!" ring. Michael says, "That's your phone." I scramble around trying to get it out of my pocket. Not wanting it to go off again, I turn it off....to a very loud shutting down sound. How embarrassing! Little did I know, my sister was calling to tell me that my brother was in the hospital. Later I found out he was going to have emergency surgery at 5:00 PM.
I went to the Bentonville hospital and went in before surgery to see my brother. He said, "I'm scared." He ended up having a twisted bowel. Scar tissue from a surgery when he was two years old wrapped around his small intestine and completely blocked it. The surgery went well and quick only 35 minutes. However, it was over 2 hours before we could see him again. They had a hard time waking him up. I pray God is using this situation to get my brothers attention. To bring him to the Lord. However, God is continuing to speak to me...making me want to be healthy! Now! My gut reaction...I don't want to eat at all!! I need change...lasting change! I want to live to be 100...a healthy 100. I better get started now. NOW is the time. I feel anxious to make it happen now...all at once...is that possible.......daydreaming.........
oh yeah back to reality!
I should not feel anxious... I should run to God. Have a thankful heart for all I do have and then let my requests be known to Him. He does care!